Be you, be free

So I swear I'm tough, I really do. Most people who know me, like really know me, know I hardly cry. I don't cry at movies or weddings. I don't have moments when I need to a moment and spend the day listening to sad music and having sentimental episodes or whatever.

I'm a bit rough around the edges I suppose. I always say my parents thought I was going to be a boy so I got some of those characteristic plus my brother and I were closer in age and I always hung out with him. I've been a feminist since I could remember, anything you could do I could do better mentality. Never show your weak, I can carry my own boxes and lift heavy things. I can beat you up throw you on the grown and sit on your head! Tough. The only point I didn't try to proof was the whole sport thing, I kinda have no hand eye coordination.

I'm loud, intense, opinionated, critical, sarcastic, type A at times, confident, defiant, I like things done a certain way, and I'm not scared to proof my point. But at the same time I can be timid, quiet, reserved, go with the flow, self-conscience, observant, apprehensive and even passive. It's this dual persona that I have. I'm never scared to share my opinion when asked, it just depends how much of it I’m willing to give you. My opinions are mine and not everybody should have access to them.

I’m not the cookie cutter type of person. I’ve always been “offbeat”, even when small. I always had my own ideas and it didn’t matter how much I tried to fit it, I would always just end up popping out even more, eventually the real me would come out. It’s funny to me how even in the most eclectic places I’ve been called unique, for example Woodstock New York, home of the hippie movement, and where a big chunk still resides. I always have a different opinion, not because I’m trying to be revolutionary or rebel or devil’s advocate, which I do play at times lol, but because I can’t help it. I wonder sometimes if I’m just THAT different or am I just bold enough to be free. Free of expectations, free of people’s perceptions, free of social norm, free of limitations to express who I am. I see it, I like it, I do it. I think it, I say it. That simple

Its hard at time to be looked at with a raised brow, or to be called "weird" all the time. But the sooner you appreciate your own ways the sooner other people will too. And you will get over those things and take it as a compliment. You are expressing yourself, your free.

I’m free to be me and I can’t try to cover or hide what can’t be hidden, who I am.